इ दोन'टी गेट आईटी!

I DON’T GET IT!
(Or I CAN FIX IT MYSELF)
In my line of work and in my own “life of service” there seems to be periods of time where I can’t believe what my ears are hearing.
The blessing, in hearing what I hear, is that I am grateful for the life that I have learned to live, and the basic move way from insane behaviour because of what I have been taught. Daily I thank that power greater than me that I am now conscious of and which, when I pay attention, gives me a life free of large doses of fear and shame.
Today’s most recent saga, an old acquaintance has called a lawyer client of mine for a get together. The reason, he has lost (for the second or third time in 2 months) his passport, and wants to attend a hockey tournament in the USA this weekend to watch his son; this after a five day detox stint following 9 weeks of nearly killing himself. The lawyer was recently told, during an emergency trip to hospital, that if he continues his life style, he will die.
I must admit that this sounds like the blind leading the blind; or, insanity in a form that I have personally experienced.
Throw on top of this a conversation with a potential client who suffers from chronic lateness (is getting chronic on this habit insane?) and it’s been an interesting 24 hour period.
With all concerned, they claim that they just don’t understand why these things happen to them, and at least with “frick and frack”, deep down they think they can fix it themselves. Unfortunately, unless things change, I foresee a couple of more needless and senseless funerals that I will be attending. Chronic lateness, I don’t think this kills but it certainly puts unneeded limitations on your life and certainly does nothing for self worth!
The people I have been interfacing with are basically decent, intelligent hard working people but people who have the deadly combination of false pride and low self esteem/respect. Deadly if not treated. Funny, they don’t understand why they do the things they do and with the lawyer and my other long term acquaintance, really believe that they can fix themselves through sheer abstinence.
Life reminds me of where I found my major problem. I found it in a mirror. After having found the problem, I swallowed my pride and reached out for help. Some fortunate ones seem to get all the help they need from a 12 step fellowship. While I certainly got (and get) help from group meetings, I needed far more help than meetings could provide. I needed the help of professionals to help me learn not only the tools I needed to live the life I was capable of, but to help me understand how I got so far off track and to address the root causes. I was fortunate to “get it” and learn the hard way that I could not fix myself.
The past 24 hours has once again reminded me, “the road to hell (and I’ve been there) is paved with good intentions.” To get off it requires action and change.
I love to see people get the life they want and am blessed that I have been a part of many success stories. As noted above, I continue to be reminded that I cannot “fix” others, particularly those who believe they can fix themselves. I have empathy for those who “just don’t get it” for they cannot be honest in front of that great tool we all own, the mirror. All I can do is be present when I can be of service! And keep on learning to be of greater service. (www.hopeserenity.ca)